I used to think arranged marriages were obscene and ridiculous cultural artifacts that were very harmful to people. As I get older though, I find them more and more attractive as a great model for a lifelong commitment.
When you are a teenager or a person in your twenties, you are seeking romance, excitement, adventure, and sexiness in a partner.
For the rest of your life though, you want a reliable, trustworthy, intelligent, and kind partner.
Many of the traits you look for in the first quarter of your life are diametrically opposed to what traits you will want in a partner later in life.
That hot girl who you can’t wait to see next weekend and who flirts with you (and everyone else) and parties like a rockstar is a complete nightmare once you have kids together. I know many older men who are married to crazy women with lots of plastic surgery who go out and cheat on them and finally they go through a hellish divorce. I know many older ladies who are married to lazy idiots who drink themselves cross-eyed every night, and end up alone late in life.
When you are young, you find reliable and trustworthy people of the opposite sex boring. This is why arranged marriages are so smart. Your parents or grandparents who have your best interests at heart and who have the knowledge of all the trials and tribulations that go with having kids together, holding down a job, and building a life are far better positioned to find you someone to marry.
Not all parents or grandparents have their children’s best interests at heart, and some of them are idiots themselves. I don’t think people should be forced into an arranged marriage, but I think people should very strongly consider the opinions of those that they trust most.
Perhaps there should be a dating app like tinder where instead of just you matching based on appearance, your friends and family can fill in a profile about you and that can help match you up with a partner who will be the best fit for you?