I am glad to hear you accomplished a month and are working on another one now! You should be really proud of yourself for that! Most people will never even admit alcohol is a problem despite medical science firmly showing now that even one drink harms and shortens your life. If you do have drinks, don’t give up. It’s taken me fifteen years to reduce my drinks as much as I have. It’s been 140 days for me now (and about three months before that bad hangover day). It’s really easy to give in and say “aw just one can’t hurt”, and really hard to say no even if no one is pushing you. But you are totally right… I spend a lot more time with my wife and kids and family I love and care about me and I am a far better dad without it.
I’ve realized that those people who only want to hang out if I’m drinking don’t want to hang out with me sober… They never liked me to start with really. I’m better off without them.
I specifically seek out people I admire to spend my time with… People who are good parents and good people and good friends and who are there for you (and there for you means to help you do chores in the morning, not get wasted at night and too sick to do chores hahaha).
I thought to myself once, “if anyone ever tried to hurt my kids, I would give my life for them without a second thought.” Then I realized that the best father is not one who just dies randomly for them, but the best father is the one who gets up every day and thinks about making the best decisions to give his kids a better life.
And in the process of making smarter decisions and giving my kids a better life, I’ve given myself a better life too.
Addiction is giving everything up for one thing. Teetotaling is giving one thing up to gain everything.