Category: Uncategorized

Desperation

A clawing need inside that cannot be ignored
Painful desire crushing down relentlessly
Constant pressure to keep going.
Frantic movement with no purpose
The heavy foot stuck to the accelerator
Inescapable scorching fire, leaving nothing.

The War Room

After interviewing Melanie last night and sending her off home, I was supposed to go to the War Room (a club on Capitol Hill) with a bunch of friends. I was just sitting at my computer, chatting online, and starting to get a little tired and thinking about skipping out when Ben called and said he and Rachelle were going to come pick me up and take me to the War Room right then. I haven’t seen Kenny in around 6 months, so I accepted. After we arrived, we parked (which was a bitch) and started walking towards the War Room. On our way we spotted two of my other friends, Ian and Eric, also headed to the War Room to see Kenny. Our whole little group made our way to the club, where we had to stand in line for awhile. When we were about to get in, we found out there was a $10 cover and neither Ian nor I had any cash so Rachelle graciously spotted us.

The War Room was packed full of people, especially on the upper deck where we were all hanging out. I didn’t really feel into the whole club atmosphere, but talked to all the people I hadn’t seen in quite some time. Kenny is doing well and was trying to convince me to go scalp a ticket to the Ohio State game today and he himself bought a ticket for $50 from someone. I think I would much rather just go down to my little gym and workout and watch the game there. Watching beastly men smash each other is good motivation for lifting.

A little later, I saw a couple of people do some yayo in the corner of the club and decided that wasn’t really my scene and Rachelle and Ben gave me a ride back home. They came inside and we went up to my roof and relaxed with a glass of wine and enjoyed the view along with good conversation before they went home.

Tackling Life

My life has generally consisted of short periods of tough challenges followed by long periods of relative stability. I think I am starting to come to the end of an especially extended time of peacefulness and am preparing myself for a struggle. I have some important decisions looming on the horizon and how I handle them will determine my future. My younger brother, Justin Gross, is also about to enter one of these periods as he is supposed to start at the University of Washington as a freshman very soon. Hopefully we will be prepared. I think of these periods of time as being much like tackling practice in football: if you are unprepared or scared or trying to avoid tackling too hard you will get smashed and hurt, but if you go in fully ready and charging as hard as you can, you will come out on top. Watch out baby, here I come!

Joel is currently a Spendthrift Bastard

I usually try and save a good chunk of my income every month and have been good about it through my first 10 months of unemployment. However, over the last 4 months, I have not been paying enough attention to my financial situation and after inspecting my bank statements I have discovered I have over a thousand dollars less today than I did two months ago.

If I disappear for awhile and you can’t get ahold of me, it means I have robbed a bank and the government is trying to hunt me down.

Crazy Dreams

I had the weirdest dreams last night.

I dreamed I was a marine biologist in some absolutely crazy aquarium with fish and sharks I invented in my own head. There was one fish that was 20 tons and just looked like a big bit of gray dough and kept almost squishing me… and Freud would’ve had a field day with this one- there was a shark that if you were in his tank, he would show his domination over you by putting your head in his mouth, but not biting down and then squirting sperm on you and there were a bunch of little sharks that gnawed on your fingers like lapdogs but didn’t do any real damage.