King Of America: Policy on Sports & Crime

When I take over my duties as King of America, I will be instituting a series of policies meant to resolve the major issues facing our nation today. Today, I am going to discuss my beautiful solution that kills two big problems with one stone: Crime and lack of entertainment.

America right now has over 2.2 million people currently in prison.… read more “King Of America: Policy on Sports & Crime”

Absolute Domination

The New England Patriots right now look like the greatest football team ever assembled. They not only have one of the most potent offenses, but their defense is smothering.

I watched their game on Sunday against the Washington Redskins (4-2) a good team with a top defense. Not only did Tom Brady rip them for 52 points, but they pitched a shutout until garbage time in the 4th quarter with 3 minutes left and defensive backups playing when the Redskins got a touchdown.… read more “Absolute Domination”


Some people say that money is the root of all evil. Those people are wrong. Money is simply a representation of man’s labor. Money is a tool that enables one man to create a good or service and then voluntarily trade it for another man’s good or service. A man who earns his fortune deserves it and should be proud of his virtue that is represented by the money he made.… read more “Achievement”


Once, I cheerfully awaited her constant calls. Every text message received was instantly replied to. We talked constantly from the time we woke up, till sleep hit us at night. We spent dozens of hours on the phone. Stolen lunches and nights were spent wrapped up in each others arms. Snuggling was tight and comfortable and happy.… read more “Pulling”

Flag Football Playoffs

Tonight is the first game in my flag football playoffs. My team, the Screamin’ Eagles, is 3-3 and matched up against the 5-1 Griffith Gladiators. I really want to win this game, because it is against some of the guys who were on my team this summer. Their quarterback, Chad, is a cocky man with a rifle arm (I broke my right ring finger catching one of his bullets).… read more “Flag Football Playoffs”