A deep, suffocating evil is about to be unleashed upon America. A monstrosity is returning to the land that has not been seen in years. People everywhere are in serious danger. The legendary Black Rooster is preparing his next dirty invasion. Fathers guard your daughters, daughters guard your puppies, and puppies guard your buttholes.
The mighty Department of Homeland Security is training it’s crack deportation teams to get rid of this evil, but it looks far overmatched for the greasy Persian hair and giant diamond earrings. The draft has been officially reinstated and everyone is asked to gird yourselves with depleted uranium chastity belts to slow the penetration of this evil.
THIS… IS… AMERICA!!!!!!!!!!